First: If you’ve never seen the movie The Princess Bride, you haven’t lived. Plus, if you haven’t seen it, this article will make a lot more sense if you watch this clip from the movie first.
All right, who is the best candidate to become president? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you decide and we all vote and find out if we made the right decision or if we will regret it for the next 4 years.
It’s so simple. All you have to do is divine from what you know of the two candidates. Obama has made great promises about hope and change so you can clearly not choose Romney. But Obama hasn’t followed through on the majority of his promises, so you can clearly not choose Obama. But Romney knows that we don’t trust Obama because of has broken his promises, and he’ll avoid talking about specifics of his tax plan and keep us thinking about the past 4 years, so you can clearly not choose Romney.
So you’ve made your decision then?
Not remotely! Because Obama is from Chicago, which is entirely peopled with criminals, so you can clearly not choose Obama.
Truly, you have a dizzying problem in front of you.
Wait till I get going. Now, where was I?
Chicago.
Yes, Chicago. And Chicago is located close to Michigan where Romney’s father was governor for 12 years and Romney grew up with a silver spoon in his mouth, so you can clearly not choose Romney.
You’re stalling now.
You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you? Obama has created a giant health care insurance mess that raises costs and adds uncertainty and doubt into everyone’s expectations for the future costs, so you can clearly not choose Obama, but Romney has created a similar system when he was governor and has flip flopped on whether it would work on a national level or not, so clearly you can not choose Romney. Obama wants to tax the rich who create jobs, so you can clearly not choose Obama. But Romney wants to tax the poor which includes most of the people you know, so you can clearly not choose Romney.
You’re trying to trick me by confusing the issues and making me vote based on pointless things like who has the most celebrity endorsements or who has the best attack ads. It won’t work.
It has worked! We don’t know anything real about the candidates, and all we want to do is keep the other side from getting into power!
Then make your choice.
I will, and I choose – What in the world can that be?
What? Where? I don’t see anything.
Well, I- I could have sworn I saw something. No matter. Let’s vote. Me for my party, and you for yours.
*Later*
You voted wrong.
You only think I voted wrong. That’s what’s so funny! I switched the parties while you weren’t looking. Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders-The most famous of which is “never get involved in a land war in Asia” – but only slightly less well-known is this: “When you vote for a member of one of the same two parties that have been running our country into the ground for the last several decades, you’ll inevitably get the same result.” Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha…
Both of the choices put before us this election are poison. Dare to think for yourself and vote for a third party candidate this year. Choosing among the same two bad choices every four years and expecting new results is the definition of insanity.
This year, if you’re tired of choosing between the lesser of two evils, don’t give in and do it again, and don’t stay home and not cast your vote. Instead get out and send a message by voting for a third party candidate.
Some of your choices
| Libertarian Party | Green Party | Constitution Party | Justice Party |
|---|---|---|---|
 |
 |
 |
 |
| Gary Johnson |
Jill Stein |
Virgil Goode |
Rocky Anderson |
You probably won’t agree 100% with any of these candidates, but if you agree with me that the current “two party system” is badly broken and needs a shakeup, get out and vote, and vote for a change!